I was feeling peckish at the end of the day yesterday – well it was nearly closing time, so I headed for the biscuit tin. A hobnob or a digestive or some sort of cookie will usually give me another 20 minutes, and perhaps an extra inch within my overalls around the waist, but I digress. However, when I got to our little kitchen, the cupboard was locked. This was a double-surprise to me as last week it was your average common-or-garden kitchen unit. However, come Monday it sported a shiny new heavy-duty padlock. This was Mrs P’s way of telling me that the diet she was making me go on was non-negotiable. 

I had a visit from an old associate earlier this week – High Street Ken. He’s a local car dealer who was, until quite recently, based on our local high street, until the value of the plot in terms of putting in flats became to obvious to ignore, and he sold up and moved his operation to an edge-of-town site like mine. After all, with the internet, you don’t really need a shop window like he had. Besides, he owned the building outright so my rich friend has become richer. Apart from the location of his business, it was ironic that he really is called Ken, in that his wife’s name is Barbara…

I’m not here. This isn’t happening. Or, I might as well not be – No, really. Over the last few days, here at Parkit Motors we noticed a steep drop-off on fresh customers making enquiries. We continued to be booked up, but the backlog we had before Christmas seemed to start dissipating. Initially, I put this down to better time management on the part of the team, and everyone completing their jobs faster. Then I looked at the jobsheets, and realised that everything was happening at the same speed as usual, sometimes slower actually. Just leafing through these and looking at the times logged on some of these very simple tasks, words will certainly need to be had with…Arthur…oh that’s awkward, moving on.

Christmas is upon us again here at Parkit Motors. A time of joy, the Season of Goodwill, twinkly lights and a tree in Reception, winter checks reminders decked out in red going out via email, and the staff Christmas party to arrange. Well, I’m not too sure about some of this. To be honest, with the rising cost of energy, and everything else I think we will have to pass on it this year. No, don’t call me Scrooge, I’m not completely stone-hearted. We could probably afford sausage rolls with a sprig of holly in to give to the staff before we close on Christmas Eve. Maybe a glass or two of Mulled Wine too, for those who are not driving…

I recently had a visit from someone I knew when I was a teenager who also ended up in the trade; Local classic car dealer Piers Bonnet. Of course, I know what you are thinking; “His name is Bonnet? Of course he was destined for this business.” Well, you’d think that, except it is pronounced ‘Bon-nay’ as in ‘Bon-nay Prince Char-lay’. Yes, it’s all a bit Keeping Up Appearances, but who am I to tell him (well, more specifically his parents years ago) how to pronounce their own name. It could have been worse; I seem to remember being told they nearly went double-barrelled as the Morgan-Bonnets. He really would have been doomed to be a classic car dealer then.

Scary times eh? No, I’m not talking about Halloween, about which Mrs P has been her usual decorative self, I’m talking about the last two years, well nearly three years now. The pandemic, lockdowns, reopening, parts supply issues, manpower shortages, the war in Ukraine, the cost of living crisis, surging fuel prices, the list goes on.

We finally went and did it. After three years, what with the pandemic and all, Mrs P and I finally managed to get away on holiday abroad this summer. It wasn’t straightforward though, then after the last couple of years, would you expect anything else? However, it did provide a salutary lesson that we were able to bring back to Parkit Motors, along with the bottle of local tipple, and the funny hat.

Consolidation, it’s the name of the game. No, wait – that’s Monopoly I was thinking of, but someone really should do a board game where the object of the exercise is to gradually take over the entire motor industry, until you have every brand, and have vertically integrated yourself to a point where you own, well, everything.

I must confess, I am not just writing for Aftermarket these days. I struck up a conversation with the Editor of our local paper at a chamber of commerce event a while back, well, to be more honest, I’ve more or less been talking her ear off at various local business events for years.

Elementary my dear…what’s going on? Sorry about that. This computer seems to have predictive text running. While the idea of Sherlock Holmes at Parkit Motors rather tickles me, I was actually going to talk about EVs. Specifically, I wanted to discuss elements necessary to their function. 

I got my fingers burnt with a battery replacement recently. Not literally of course, as that would be very painful, and I would have mentioned that aspect first. I have a very low pain threshold, and I am also a talker. This is not a good combination. Anyway, luckily, we’re not talking about an electric car battery either, or else you might be reading ‘Arthur Parkit – in Memoriam’ as written by Mrs P. We are set up for EVs, but I am scrupulously careful around that bay. 

I’ve been thinking about staff recently. No, not the lot I have now, they all seem quite content and I have no particular issues with them, apart from their radio station choices sometimes. No, I’ve been thinking about what I would do if I did need to replace one of them, or even a few at the same time.

You see some strange stuff when you are driving around. I was taking a vehicle out for a test drive a few days ago. It was one of those sunny, bitterly cold winter days when everything is so bright and clear it hurts your eyes, and often your nose for some reason. Clear days are good for road safety, but not so great if there are some scratches on the paintwork of your car that you’d rather not look at, as if you don’t, surely, they aren’t there. On days like our day in question, the scratches are clearer than the rest of the car.